Surprise, Bats
by ghostboi
Summary: Batman/Joker. Nolan.verse/TDK. fulfilling a request on the Batman Kink Meme; "Bats/Joker: fingersucking/sex.noises". Rated M for slashy.ness


This went a bit longer than expected/intended. meh

Title: Surprise, Bats! (ssh, couldn't think of a better one)  
pairing: bats/joker, obviously. nolan!verse.  
rating: NC.17 for slashy sex.type stuff  
Disclaimers: i don't own batman or the joker, but either one of them are welcome to own me. ahem.  
A/N: The Bat's POV. This were chosen from the list of unfulfilled requests on the Batman Kink Meme(capsrock./1050.html) - "Joker/Batman, finger-sucking and sex noises" or "Batman/Joker, masturbation, Batman as voyeur (joining in is optional)", or both. We all know i probably don't have the 'voices' of these chars down (still) & they're probably ooc, & my fics are the suck compared to some, but here's my lame attempt. Comments/flames/reviews/whatever welcome.

_He hadn't expected to come upon the Joker, half a block from where he had stowed away the Batpod. He had glanced down the alley in passing: He hadn't expected to see the painted man in the alleyway, back to him, one hand against the wall. At first he wasn't certain it was even the Joker, but that purple suit and that curly green hair was a fairly big give.away. _

_He glanced around, ascertaining the whereabouts of the madman's henchmen. Seeing none lurking in the dark corners of the alley, he approached silently, cautiously, alert for any attack, waiting for the Joker to become aware of his presence. He was half-relieved and still more bewildered when the man made no move to face him, didn't even seem to be aware of his presence. He halted as he heard a barely audible groan from the figure leaning against the brick; was the clown hurt? _

_He was only steps away from the madman whom had been holding his city captive for weeks, and still no indication that the Joker knew he was there. He **must** be hurt, that had to be the only explanation. The painted man was far too jumpy, far to paranoid and manic, to be caught unawares.._

_His fingertips were reaching toward the man's shoulder when the Joker seemed to become aware of his presence. He started, moved to turn, but before he could complete the action, Batman's arm was around his throat. He reached forward and pinned the other man's hand to the wall with his own._

"_Hiiii Bats.." the voice was a low, calm purr but it did nothing to cover the man's rapid breathing._

"_Show me your other hand," his own voice was a growl at the clown's ear. A low laugh from the other man caused him to tighten his grip on the Joker's throat. He nearly huffed in exasperation as a low hum of what could have been pleasure escaped the captive man's throat. The Bat shoved him forward against the wall. "Mm.." he could feel the man's breathing speed up, and was the Joker pressing back against him deliberately or was it just because he had the man pinned as he did? He shoved the thought away as his hand slid from the man's neck, up to grasp his face. He turned the painted face toward him a bit as he growled, "Hands. Now!" "Little busy, Bats.." the man was definitely arching back against him now. The Bat blinked as he felt the slim body pressed back against him, then glanced down over the Joker's shoulder, attempting to see what he was doing with the hand he refused to show. Searching for a weapon, no doubt.._

_Batman froze suddenly, and the Joker laughed in apparent glee. "What the hell are you doing?" the surprise -and disgust- was obvious in his voice. The Joker was ..well, jerking off, for lack of a better term._

"_Man's got needs, Bats." That grating voice was mocking and delighted as his discomfort, made him want to smash the clown's head into the wall. He unconsciously tightened his hold on the man's neck, a defensive maneuver, as the Joker shifted, and the smaller man moaned low. "Wanna know what I think about when I do this?"_

"_No." _

"_You," the clown continued regardless of his response, unable to completely suppress a giggle, "You and your, ah, methods of justice." His voice took on a (off.key) sing.song tune as he sang, "When I think about you I t-t-touch myyselllf.."_

_He was certain he was visibly twitching. "I should snap your neck, clown," he growled the threat in the other's ear; it had the opposite effect from what he intended. The Joker's breath hitched in his chest and he arched back against the Bat's Kevlar as he murmured, "Do it. Do it, Bats. Hurt me.."_

_It was time to release him and leave this scene, end this madness (because that's exactly what this was). He knew that. He told himself that. He was close, so close, to doing just that. The madman's words gave him pause, and his eyes involuntarily fell to the man's rather busy left hand. He watched for several seconds as the clown stroked himself, before finally asking, "You want pain?" "Yesss," the word was a hiss between gritted teeth. The Bat's eyes went to the painted face, watched as that tongue flicked across those red red lips, and he released his hold on the man's right wrist to tangle his fingers in curly green hair. He pulled the Joker's head back, eyes riveted to that mouth and its permanent grin as the smaller man's tongue shot out again. Almost of their own accord, his fingers slid up to follow the path the Joker's tongue had just made. The clown made a sound that was almost a whimper, his lips parting, as the Bat's fingers trailed across his lips, other hand tightening in his hair. _

_The Bat took the obvious invitation for what it was & slid two leather covered fingers between the man's parted lips. He felt his own body tighten as the Joker nipped as his fingertips; half a second later the smaller man was sucking on them. He told himself to stop this now, but he wasn't paying much attention to his own voice of reason at the moment. He allowed it, a combination of curiosity, intrigue and (lust, c'mon admit it to yourself, lust) disgust driving his reaction. The Bat licked his own lips and released his hold on the green hair he was gripping tightly; he slid his now free hand down the Joker's side, lower. His hand brushed the madman's, the one he was using to pleasure himself, and he paused. His moment of hesitation ended when the Joker moaned softly, lips and tongue working over his fingers. Pressing his own built body hard against the slender man's back, his fingers closed around the Joker's hand and cock, shadowing the man's strokes. Another whimper escaped the clown's throat as he fell back against the Bat. His head rested back against the Bat's armored shoulder, body arching against him in all the right places._

"_This is wrong," The Bat's voice was a husky growl, his own body hard and throbbing now. The other man laughed around his fingers but didn't stop what he was doing. A shiver ran through Batman as he felt that tongue trace their length, felt that mouth sucking and biting them, heard the sound of it. The image of that mouth on other parts of his body leapt unbidden into his head, and he groaned, eyes closed and body rocking into the madman's. He felt the Joker arch hard against his hand as the sound escaped him; it fueled the lust that was building within him. The clown was almost purring when he shoved the Joker's hand away from his cock and took over the stroking, squeezing and twisting it to make the man gasp. _

_The painted man almost snarled when the Bat pulled his fingers from his mouth. He pushed his body back against the black-armored one, licking his lips and sliding his hand along the muscled arm that was wrapped around his hip. The bigger man smirked, only partially amused by the madman's hungers. He voice was low, almost teasing, as he tauted softly in the man's ear, "You want pain, Joker?" The man in question nodded against his shoulder, biting his lower lip. He growled as the Bat instructed, "Beg for it."_

"_I'm not begging you for any-" the words trailed off in a breathless yelp as the Bat fisted the man's balls, tugged them hard. "Beg," the Bat insisted again, his lips brushing the side of the man's neck. The clown cast him a sidelong glance, eyes half-closed and lips parted. There was hunger etched on his face, lust and hatred and something indescribable. _

"_Who's playing games now?" he almost missed the breathless question. His response was to give the Joker's cock a hard stroke, hand sliding low to tug his balls again. The smaller man arched against his hand, growling in frustration as he pulled said hand away._

"_You want it, you beg for it."_

_The clown started to speak but his words were lost beneath a hum of pleasure as the Bat's fingers slid up his throat to wrap around his neck. He fell back against the Bat again, entire body taunt as a wire, as the hand tightened on his neck._

_He slowly opened his eyes as the Bat's hand went still on both his cock and his throat; the anti.hero was waiting. He thrust his hips against the man's hand, growling, hungering for more. The Bat's fingers tightened on his throat, cutting of some of his air, and he whimpered, lust filling his veins like chaos._

_The word finally escaped his lips, a breathless sound in the night air, "Batsss.. Please.."_

_A kind of triumph touched the Bat at the simple word. He resumed his stroking of the clown's throbbing cock, twisting and tugging it to send thrills of pain through the other man's body. He slid his muscled arm around the man's throat, cutting off more of his air, reveling in the soft moans and purrs the action granted._

_He stroked the smaller man until he felt the lithe body go tense against him, saw the man's lips part as he struggled for breath. He bit down on that spot where the neck met shoulder, bit the clown hard. The Joker gasped in pained pleasure, body arching back against him, grinding into him, and he shoved him forward with his own body, pinning him chest and face against the brick wall. Half a second later, the clown was coming in his hand and all over the brick, silent and breathless. The Bat continued stroking him, slowing his strokes as the clown expended himself, body held tight against the black armored one. He stopped when the clown went limp against him, energy spent and breathing ragged._

"_Enjoy that?" the Bat growled in the man's ear, wiping his hand on the leg of the madman's purple trousers. Before the other could response, he continued, "Next time it's going to **hurt**." He released the smaller man and stepped back away from him._

_When the Joker turned his head to look back at him, licking his lips, the Bat was gone._


End file.
